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Byzantine Catholic convert, wife, mother to eight children.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Plans Vs. Reality

Do you remember that scene in Anne of Green Gables where Mirilla is meeting Anne for the very first time? "Tell me about yourself", Mirilla inquires. Anne replies, "If you let me tell you what I imagine about myself it would be much more interesting."

My imagined world is so orderly, so clean, so perfect, so.... not my real life. I've taken the time to make beautiful schedules, goals, outlines, and charts. However, somewhere along the way family members get sick, mice invade the house, or the dog gets a little too friendly with a porcupine (all actual events), and low and behold I'm behind in the laundry, and dinner ends up being toast and eggs.....again. Now I am not saying carefully made schedules are a bad thing.....sometimes they even work out! Yet, no matter how organized a person you are, there are just those days that we must be willing to adapt.

Chaos or calm I try to remember one simple daily prayer....." Dear Lord, please help me to accomplish all that is necessary today." God knows my family's needs. He can see the big picture and the final goal a lot more clearly than I can. Sometimes God takes me in a different direction than I originally planned and I need to learn to yield my will over to His will. Even Jesus prayed, "not my will but yours be done, and we are to "take up our cross and follow Him". Sometimes that means making a simple dinner because I have to spend extra time potty training my toddler. Sometimes it means setting aside a grammar lesson because my kids need some one-on-one cookie baking time with mom. Sometimes it means I have to take a nap while my capable 9 year old makes PB&J for lunch because I was up all night with a sick baby. Whatever it is, as long as I know that I am truly seeking God's will I can rest assured that He is taking care of what really needs to take place that day. Whether it matches my imagined day or not.

However, there are days when I am derailed due to my own selfishness. It is so easy to make little excuses for myself when I spend too much time on the computer, phone, or watching TV. At times I just don't feel like trying, or asking God what He wants from me. I can not have God's blessing if I am not attempting to do His will with my whole heart. There is always grace, but I need to cooperate with that grace to live out my vocation as wife and mother like He intends me to. If we allow slothful behavior to continue it can become a pattern of serious sins of omission. When we are idle with our time we are failing to do the things God has given us to do. We are also setting a bad example for our children to follow. Do as I say, not as I do does not work very well.

Oh, that reminds me.....time to exit the blogosphere and tackle those dishes!